Seattle, WA — April 1, 2026 — Plugable Technologies, a leading developer of connectivity solutions, today announced the TEA-POT, a Tepid Eternal Actuation fusion reactor for the home that utilizes “Tepid Fusion” to power your daily life. 

Designed for folks who want to live off the grid without leaving the city, the Tepid Fusion Tank delivers 1 gigawatt (1,000 megawatts), or roughly enough power to produce a 3-second AI video. With this power output, users can comfortably sit at home creating “art”, adjective-rich comments to post on popular social media posts that sound clever as long as no one reads too closely, and of course, almost believable 3-second video clips. And it does it without incurring costly electric bills. 

“This isn’t the Mr. Fusion your grandpa always dreamed of,” said Timmy Arthrodesis, Chief Fusion Officer of Plugable. “This is Tepid Fusion. Unlike cold fusion, which’ll never leave the realm of science fiction, or nuclear fission, which requires more space and infrastructure than the typical consumer has access to, Tepid Fusion is a mostly safe and affordable solution.”

While the company cautions users to avoid prolonged exposure to the device, they insist the Tepid Fusion Tank is so safe that children and pets can stand within 100 yards of the device and experience minimal long-term effects. “It’s no worse than the headache or liver damage you’d expect from a three-day bender,” Timmy told reporters. “And look at this, finger nails and hair just fall right out. No more pesky trips to the barber or nail salon.” 

The Plugable TEA Pot, available in black, silver, and steampunk, can be purchased on Plugable.com and on Amazon for $99.99 with a limited 20% off launch coupon.   

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